Ciaphas Cain's Blog of Doom

-Dan: DM (Dungeon Master)

-Jenny - Sister of Battle

-Pat - Guardsmen

-Connor - Arbites

-Steve - Tech-Priest

-Me - Sanctioned Psyker & Senior Acolyte

-Important NPC - Inquisitor Xorael of Ordo Xenos

Basically, we had been dispatched by Inquisitor Xorael on a system-wide campaign through the Vantos system in the Ultima Segmentum against a shadowy Xenos enemy of whose origin we could not ascertain. After a battle that raged throughout the caves on the outmost lying world against the foul Eldar, and an earlier encounter against a Chaos cult (Quick aside, I swear, what part of Ordo Xenos do you not understand Dan? Fire does not burn immaterial EVIL too well!) we had thought it was an Eldar incursion, and spent much time hunting throughout the ruins lying on the closest planet to the system's slowly dying sun, followed by a chase throughout the capital city of the most populous planet in the Vantos system we were sure we had eliminated the Eldar threat, and would be moving onto our

next campaign. Of course, Ciaphas is never allowed to have nice things, and this was not to be..

So, as Garviel (the name of my character in game) was making his routine passes on Tiama (Jenny's Sister of Battle) aboard the Song of Hope (The cruiser of Inquisitor Xorael) when Xorael summoned us to the War Room. Apparently there had been a mass invasion by "Implacable machines of unknown origin" sta

ged on the rural farming world of the system, Horinis, and Xorael instructed us to follow him down to the surface to meet with the head of the local PDF to figure out the exact nature of the threat.

Holy. Frakking. Throne. Oh no, it couldn't just be some renegade servitors could it? Oh no, it had to be a BUGE invasion by Necrons! Upon landing

to meet the Planetary Governor and the PDF Commander, we were immediately assaulted by said Commander! Turns it out it was a Necron Lord using some sort of unknown C'Tan technology by orders of The Deceiver to infiltr

ate and weaken the system's defenses for an invasion (We still haven't ascertained the reasons behind this). Luckily, Pat got a lucky shot with his Hellgun in and nailed it in the face, and Tiama had boltered the dang thing in the torso earlier, resulting in a dead Necron Lord, though Xorael cut it to pieces with his power sword just to be safe.

So after that fun encounter, Xorael called for support from the rest of the Inquisition, and decided that we needed to find out exactly where the Necrons were invading and proceeded to watch Konor (Connor's name, creative, I know) beat the piss out of the traitorous Governor. After a successful "interrogation" Xorael determined that we would be the scouting vanguard for the coming fleet. Fan-Frak-Tastic. So, we all piled into one of our transports and headed off to the canyons across the continent. Upon arrival we.. Well.. Let's just say poor Garviel nearly crapped his pants and he's just an imaginary character.

One thing you have to know about Necrons, they never do anything half-assed. There was like THREE MONOLITHS, and apparently Xorael got caught up in some sort of insanity and decided we'd attempt to take out some of the Necrons in order to give the Imperial forces half a chance. TERRIBLE. IDEA. Our idiotic stealth demolition mission ended abruptly when Xorael got Gaussed in the FACE. After that, it all kind of went to hell. My reaction? RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! After seizing Xorael's Rosette (Which can survive Gaussing, who knew?), his sweet witch hat, and the Power Sword he dropped earlier on to replace my lost chainsword (Stupid Flayed One!) I spammed firey doom and got us the hell out of there, luckily Necrons is slow.

So.. Guess who's now an Inquisitor? This guy! Now all I have to do is figure out how to deal with a huge Necron invasion fleet... This is so not going to end well.

-Ciaphas Cain

-Ciaphas Cain